Carol (Hodges) Hansen

Carol Hansen was a member of the RLDS church for forty-eight years. After graduating from Graceland College in 1948 she became very involved in church activities at the Walnut Park and Beacon Heights congregations. In the early 1970’s she began looking objectively at Joseph Smith’s teachings and came to the conclusion they were diametrically opposed to Biblical Christianity. Consequently, she left the church and together with other former RLDS members, established LifeLine Ministries to provide accurate historical and doctrinal information for RLDS members whose love of the truth surpasses their love for “the church.” This is her testimony.

Independence, Missouri

I was one of seven children born into a wonderful RLDS family. I felt very privileged to be raised in Independence Missouri, among those I believed were the Lord’s “chosen people.” I was baptized in the Stone Church at eight years of age and grew up never doubting the teachings of Joseph Smith. In 1948 I graduated from Graceland College, an RLDS educational institution at Lamoni, Iowa, and spent most of the next twenty years working in various church-related tasks such as teaching Sunday School, working in Zion’s League, directing youth choirs and the many other activities performed by faithful members.

In the 1960’s I became involved with a “dissident group” within the RLDS Church. Believing that the church leaders had gone into apostasy and that our group had been chosen by God to admonish them of their iniquities, we went to many congregations warning of the judgment of the Lord on leaders and members who would not repent and turn back to the “pure teachings” of Joseph Smith.

Our spiritual experiences were the compelling force that drove us to continue the “Lord’s mission.” These ranged from visions and dreams to audible voices, ‘miracles’, and prophetic messages. In one vision, I was shown the sealed portion of the Book of Mormon and was told that our group would receive this record when we met certain conditions. In another vision Jesus appeared to me, holding in his hand the three standard books of the church. Calling me by name, He said, “If you know what is in these books you will make it.” Needless to say, these experiences not only solidified my belief in the restoration but also in our group’s mission.

These continued encounters kept us in a type of “spiritual slavery” which is common to those who live by RLDS logic and reason. When something we were told failed to occur, we were always reassured by a still small voice which said, “Don’t give up, you have been brought thus far as a trial of your faith” (Doctrine and Covenants, Section 102:5c).

After several years of unfulfilled dreams, failed prophecies, and seeing the effect this was having on my family, I was forced to admit that I had been deceived. When people questioned me regarding my involvement in this group, I answered that when a person truly believes their ‘leader’ is God’s mouthpiece, they are bound to give absolute adherence to whatever instruction comes through them whether it makes sense or not. Those who have been entangled in this type of cult activity know this to be true. I have since learned that the Christian world has irrefutable proof that the Bible is reliable and completely trustworthy, and that it is the standard of truth by which all spiritual experiences must be measured.

Even after going through this period of being grossly deceived, I still believed wholeheartedly in Joseph Smith, the three standard books and the hope that Zion would someday be a reality.

My dad, who was an elder in the church, was the first person in my life that caused me to begin doubting the “restoration.” He told me he didn’t believe the Book of Mormon was divinely translated and that bothered me a lot, because he was very well read on matters pertaining to church history, and I really respected his opinion. He also told me that he believed Joseph Smith was guilty of practicing polygamy in Nauvoo. He tried to persuade me to read, Nauvoo: Kingdom On the Mississippi, a book which included documented evidence showing it was Joseph Smith, not Brigham Young, who authored the revelation on polygamy. I refused to read the book and tried to ignore the doubts being instilled in my mind.

It was about this time I began attending a Book of Mormon class that was being taught by a retired RLDS missionary. To my surprise he asked me if I would read Nauvoo: Kingdom on the Mississippi, the same book my dad had suggested I read. At first I was very defensive and told him I wouldn’t read anything that would cause me to doubt Joseph Smith’s calling as a prophet. He said to me, “You know, if a person really wants to know the truth, they won’t be afraid to read both sides of an issue.” With that challenge I made the decision to read the book. The abundance of evidence I found, revealing Joseph Smith’s involvement in polygamy, really shook me up. And so I decided to begin my own research into the church history I thought I knew so well. I was shocked when I discovered it was vastly different from what I had been taught growing up in Sunday School.

I went to the RLDS historian’s office to find out all I could about the coming forth of the Book of Mormon, certain in my mind that I would be reassured of it’s truthfulness. During this study I found that Emma Smith, Oliver Cowdery and David Whitmer, who were eyewitnesses to the translation process, all agreed that Joseph Smith didn’t use the gold plates while translating the Book of Mormon. I wondered why they were preserved for l400 years if they weren’t needed. But the biggest jolt to me was learning that Joseph used a seer stone (which he put in his hat) to translate the gold plates, the same one he had used to divine for hidden treasure!

As I continued my study, I began having fears that maybe the church I had always believed in wasn’t the only true church after all. I was determined to find out the truth. I prayed diligently for answers. After several months of study, I came to the place where I could sincerely pray, “Lord, I don’t care any more whether the church is true or false, all I want is the truth.” When I finished my prayer, I decided to read the two Bible passages I had always believed proved the validity of the Book of Mormon, Ezekiel Ch. 37 and Isaiah 29. I reasoned that even if everything else about the church was wrong, at least these texts would prove Book of Mormon true.

I had read these scriptures many times before, but this time was different. As I read the passage in Ezekiel 37, I could see it was not referring to the Book of Mormon, but was speaking about God’s promise of bringing back together the Northern and Southern Kingdoms of Israel, making them one nation. When I read Isaiah 29, I understood for the first time that the passage was not referring to the Book of Mormon, but instead to God’s punishment on Israel for her many sins. This experience broke the final tie that held me to the church. God had answered my prayer and removed the spiritual blindness from my eyes! I was convinced that Joseph Smith had not restored the true gospel, but had instead promoted a “different gospel.”

At this point I made the painful but necessary decision to leave the church I had loved so much. The Lord blessed my decision and through his goodness my husband, a priesthood member, and our four sons also left. Only those who have made a similar break from the church can relate to the heart-wrenching emotions that accompany it. Many times those who leave are ostracized by family members and long time friends. The love that was so easily shared by people of ‘like-beliefs’ is suddenly gone and an invisible wall goes up. When former RLDS members become born again Christians, and attempt to share their new-found faith with family members and friends, it often results in further alienation. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit gives comfort during this time, and finding fellowship with others who have walked the same path brings needed encouragement. The following scripture also gives hope and comfort. “And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters, or father or mother or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life” (Matt. 19:29).

During the years I belonged to the church I heard just enough about Jesus to have a hungering for him, but never enough to understand the way of salvation. I believed that baptism, confirmation by the elders, faithfulness to ‘the church’ and involving myself in good works would hopefully earn me of the highest glory in heaven. These were the teachings that were preached from the pulpit and taught in Sunday School, and they were what I accepted.

It is only by the grace of God that I have been delivered from the deception that blinds the minds of those indoctrinated in false teachings. It is not easy for the blindness to be lifted, but if a person has a sincere desire for truth, it is the truth to which the Holy Spirit will lead them.

Before leaving the church, I had actually ridiculed the idea that a person could be saved by just saying a simple prayer. It seemed too simplistic—too easy, and I had joined with others in referring to it as cheap grace.

Nevertheless, after studying the Bible verses in reference to salvation, I decided to pray that “simple prayer.” I confessed that I was a sinner and that Jesus died on the cross and rose again to forgive my sins. I asked Him to come into my heart and be my Lord and Savior. And He did! It was truly a miracle of new birth. The contrast between the “religion” I grew up with and the relationship I now had with Jesus was like night and day. For the first time in my life I became aware of the tremendous price He paid for my sins and the meaning of His shed blood on the cross. I realized that the priceless gift of salvation is not found in church membership, ordinances, or good works, but in a personal relationship with Christ. The words of an old hymn took on a new and very special meaning for me:

Amazing grace, how sweet the sound,
That saved a wretch like me,
I once was lost, but now I’m found,
Was blind but now I see.

Praise the Lord!

I’m so grateful that in the years since leaving the church I’ve had the privilege of witnessing
to my Mom, Dad, two sisters and a brother-in-law, all of whom left the church and became born-again believers. PTL!
Shortly after leaving the church I went through a period of wondering whether or not I was
doing the right thing by initiating a ministry to help other RLDS come to the truth as I had. I
prayed for a confirmation from the Lord and He led me to the following scripture that left no
doubt in my mind as to the direction I should take:

“Do not be afraid: keep on speaking, do not be silent.
For I am with you, and no one is going to attack and
harm you, because I have many people in this city”
Acts 18:9-10

As a result of this scripture, LifeLine Ministries to RLDS began.